tears
I thought it was hard leaving. What I didn’t realise then, is that it’s easier to leave somewhere when you can turn around and run back and get those last hugs in, and the last waves, and know that there’s someone feeling the same on the other side. The worst part is being so far away, with no one to turn around and run back to, and thinking of how much you truly miss those people.
Life as I know it.
I’m Feelin rough I’m Feelin raw I’m in the prime of my life.
Let’s make some music make some money find some models for wives.
I’ll move to Paris, shoot some heroin and fuck with the stars.
You man the island and the cocaine and the elegant cars.
This is our decision to live fast and die young.
We’ve got the vision, now let’s have some fun.
Yeah it’s overwhelming, but what else can we do?
Get jobs in offices and wake up for the morning commute?
Forget about our mothers and our friends.
We were fated to pretend.
I’ll miss the playgrounds and the animals and digging up worms.
I’ll miss the comfort of my mother and the weight of the world.
I’ll miss my sister, miss my father, miss my dog and my home.
Yeah I’ll miss the boredom and the freedom and the time spent alone.
But there is really nothing, nothing we can do.
Love must be forgotten. Life can always start up anew.
The models will have children, we’ll get a divorce,
we’ll find some more models, Everything must run its course.
We’ll choke on our vomit and that will be the end.
We were fated to pretend.
I miss my best friend.
A: so I literally just got a call from the gyno and I don’t have gonorrhea or chlamydia
A: now how can I give it to you?
M: damn
M: looks like you’re screwed with your canceling out plan
M: sounds like you’re getting herpes bitch!!
A: fuck well maybe I can pick up crabs by tomorrow and we’ll be good
M: aiight, let me know, we need some risks and danger in our sex life…
A: I know right. the gag ball and torture chair are getting a little old
M: I got handcuffs!!
A: wooow. so do I lol
M: yeah, but aren’t yours fuzzy?
M: I got the legit cops and robbers shit from the dollar store
[please note: all of this is a legit conversation, however, we were, in fact, joking....]
Two Days to Freedom
Two more days of no fighting, no drama, no bitching or sarcasm. No 3am phone calls that wake the dead, or fights for no reason.
thank god.
week, in retrospect
It started out slow, but then the snowball of bad things kept rolling down the mountain, picking up speed and size. I’m getting ready to drop kick a bitch. A new day dawned on the 4ht, figuratively as well as literally. [But I'm super glad about that] It’s been a rainy, muggy, wet, annoying weather week. I have yet to see the boy, as well as Ar. Some weekend.
I rushed a portfolio, skipped bio, and drove a car the the carwash, because it was oatmeal-ed and toothpaste-d. I sang a song, and dominated at beer pong (4 games straight). I danced in the moonlight, went to Knight Madness, and attempted to make the $500 shot (at which I failed… miserably). I haven’t talked to my best friend. I miss her more then anything. I watched my dog die, slowly in her sleep, the most painful thing for my Uncle and Timothy. Some week.
